in a blog over the sea

i feel really weird. eli and i worked on the movie a whole lot yesterday. I miss sharing music with him. or rather i miss him sharing music with me. he showed me bed head yesterday, i like them a lot. The movie is comming along really nicely. im really happy with it. eli is great at seeing how the shooting should be, i hope the two of us continue making short films.

i realized yesterday, that i have been having a problem with growing up. (in that i dont want to do it). Eli made the point of moving in all together, the four of us, and ultimatly megan too. (so five really) it sounds like a good way to start my adult life i think. I dont know, i am really frightened by the idea of loosing my best friend, my mom. so its scary.i want to do it though, if josh is okay with it. I think the four of us living together would be fun. I dont know, i was looking at some of the places eli had been looking at and it seems like a good idea. I dont know i dont know. its josh's decision. If he thinks its a good idea i will do it.

my tummy hurts with the thought of this. oi oi oi.! we are working on the movie again today. Its really lovely. I get paid tomorrow. i start job two next week, and then next sunday im away to maui!.im lost, really lost, what am i doing.

today is a thursday, then friday, then work work. im close to finished with my senior project portfolio #1.

i just want to be good.